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helleroskjar

helleroskjar

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Finding Zach
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Boys of Vice City
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Special Forces - Mercenaries Part II (Special Forces, #2 part 2) - Aleksandr Voinov,  Marquesate,  Vashtan Dan's brother is a loving and caring father and husband to his family, Duncan would like to learn more about his brother's life and what he feels.

First, he says little about things, but then also tells the truth about Vadim which helps to be all the more complicated, yet easy, Duncan and his wife are very open about many things, not so narrow-minded as Dan think they are and what he has been afraid.

Vadim also get talked to doctor william about his torture and what it has done to him, William is afraid that he only uses Dan as someone who takes care of him and not someone who is his boyfriend/lover.

Dan is also being investigated but says nothing about how his legs feel. 

Wedding Night in France and the day before the wedding is not exactly thrilled when Jean says he wants a night with Dan and that they can take the legion lieutenant Beauvais with Them to have sex, Dan/Vadim/Jean/Beauvais. Jean is playing Dan and Vadim Against each other.

Beauvais is a closed gay and do not like what Dan tells him the truth, that gets Dan to feel when they come to blows and only stops when they again become excited and having sex on the lawn.

later, they have a serious conversation and says Dan some words of wisdom to Beauvais. 

Dan and vadim's wars in the Balkans is different in many ways, they are only allowed to a report what they have seen and are not in action as when they were enemies against each other in Afghanistan.

All soldiers are restless because they can do nothing and do not get the order to kill. 

If Vadim talked open to Dan that he did not like that Dan had sex with others and what it did to him, then Dan stop immediately, Dan loves Vadim too high to lose him again.

Katya I hate when she uses that Dan is vulnerable and says that she wants another child and that Dan's is what she needs. So she raped Dan and says that if he tries to contact her child, she cries rape.

First, she tries to destroy Dan and vadim's relationship by sending a picture and letter, Dan when not explain anything before Vadim misunderstand and beat Dan.

They do not talk to each other for a long time and only then they are both close to death and close to being caught, they begin to talk again. 

Dan sees sex with others as something where he can get Buddy sex without all these complicated feelings and without love. He is attracted to them, but not in love with them. This misunderstands Vadim especially with Jean because he knows that Jean is in love with Dan and might think that Dan feels the same way.

Berlin Hooch / Vadim Italy Jean / Dan. U.S. Hooch / Vadim

France Dan / Vadim / Jean / Beauvais

This is to get a headache from where they had both talked about an open relationship where they both had other partner was okay, but no one talks open about it and there are several misconceptions from both Dan and Vadim.

What hurts Dan is that Vadim is in love with Hooch because somehow he gives the old Vadim back and Dan can not do anything, Dan can only watch helplessly and hide that he is hurt and upset.

Dan says nothing even that he will lose his leg and never be the same again, forced to retire prematurely. This he tries to displace when his desire is to be in the job a few more years. 

The surprise is that Vadim keeps Dima caught and Dima later living with Maurice before Dan plays matchmaker and Markus falls in love head over heels for Dima.

Both Mark and Dima have Dan as sex friends and they are also Dan says open that he can not give what Vadim hunger.

Dan's legs can not take it anymore and he is quickly driven and flown to a hospital in England, he does not speak more now and as Vadim after his torture.

All this should get Vadim to respond to that something is wrong. 
But he did not react to it and now feel that it is all Dan's fault, and makes the same mistake as Dan did after he had freed Vadim. 

Both men try to fight their demons in their own way, and the many misunderstandings makes everything worse.

I understand both how Dan and Vadim have it, I do not hate both men for what they do. Their hell has never been finished, they have had peaceful moments, but it's calm before the storm.

It feels like many hate Dan and forget that you are always two to start a quarrel and fight. This I think is unfair since Dan is suffering just as much as Vadim. Vadim was tortured and Dan also suffered from the psychological, Dan really try to understand what Vadim has lived through and talk to vadim's doctor, supports and comforts him.

But Vadim forget also that Dan is his lover and not one that only takes care of him, this would then injure anyone who is exposed to this. How would you not also feel that your body can not do more like you wanted and now forced to retire prematurely, all this wear Dan around without Vadim realize it. 

Alek has caught me in his net and I love to read books special forces, this is books is emotionally a roller coster and where there are many surprises, both good and sad things. There is violence, Lust, torture, heartache and friendship. Matches against their inner demons and external problems that arise.

The last book in the series, I really hope for a good end and that maybe they can finally talk open about their feelings and thoughts, since none of them is a mind reader and they both misunderstand and hurt each other, although it is not what they want.